Will you blow on my dice?
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Randomize
