would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize