The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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