im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
