i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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