Its about making memories worth repressing
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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