Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
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