I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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