Duck Duck Cougar?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
