you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
