i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
