I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize