Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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