I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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