we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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