plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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