I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
