you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
