i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
