and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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