Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
