I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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