this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I could fuck to npr.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
