First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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