So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
