Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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