Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
