can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
