It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
