He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
i think my cat just said my name.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
