Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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