She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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