She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
