Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
That accounts for only three of the penises
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
