its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize