No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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