there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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