We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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