Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Ketchup is God's man juice
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
