question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
