Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Randomize
