i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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