Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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