Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
