guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
