Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
