just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
