Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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