I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
