I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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